beans, beans, beans. the more you eat.

beans are magical and not just because they make you toot.  although tooting can be quite magical.  beans are cheap, easy to prepare, full of protein, and there are tons to choose from.  thankfully, both mike and hendrix enjoy beans ---otherwise we'd be in the poor house and all out of options.  here's what you need to know about beans.
1. dry beans are obviously cheaper and much easier to prepare than you may think.
rinse beans, pick out the duds, put in a pot and fill with lots of water.  (at least 6 inches above the beans) bring to a boil, skim off the foam, and simmer for about 1 1/2 hour - 2 hours.  you can do this while you are watching bravo tv reruns. seriously.
2. canned beans are cheap, too! just rinse and drain before using because the can goo will not enhance your dish. trust me.
3. beans can be frozen.  freeze any unused dry beans that you have cooked in their cooking liquid for up to a year.
4. lentils cook super fast.  they are like the superhero of beans. and fancier.
5. beans can sit in the fridge for over a week.  i make lunch out of them or make a quick dinner side out of them all the time.

now go cook some beans and share your recipes with me....

i believe in cooking

my friend summer and i were talking about gardening, food, clemetine's p+p, and cooking. . .when she said, " i believe in cooking." just like that, all the pieces fell into place.  she summed up what her and i have been talking about for years.  what i have been talking about with everyone.  her and i believe in cooking .  for this reason, we value local food. we value gardening.  we value canning.  we value freezer chests.  we value cook's illustrated. 
summer gave me a bumper sticker that she got at penzey's. it says....
love people.  cook them tasty food. 
she then threw me a bridal shower that was full of lovely food...endive with bleu cheese and mandarin oranges, cheese plates, beautiful pickled things, a smores bar, a hot cocoa & apple cider station, full bar, homemade sandwiches, lovingly made sweets, handmade marshmallows....food is love.
i give food to people when they have babies, when a loved one passes, for the holidays....whenever i want to show love. 
when i make something without love it tastes like shit.  when i am angry, rushed, stressed...it tastes like shit.  maybe that's why people who don't like to cook, shouldn't. if you want to know how to cook and you want to like it...all you need to know is that if you believe in it, you believe in the power...the power of a home cooked, lovingly made meal, that it will turn out.  sandwiches are always better when someone else makes them.

sometimes it's good to get real with yourself...

you know when you apply for jobs or have interviews and they ask you to describe yourself?  i decided to do that for myself. and you, i guess....

i am a former wannabe hipster who was a fashion obsessed,overindulgent party girl who was a waitress for over 10 years. then i got a job at a french wine bar/restaurant with a from scratch kitchen in the basement and specialty grocery store in the back. it changed my life. now i am former food grower, marketing maven, baby crazed mother that is about to marry the farmer of her dreams. and i am too hip for rural america.

well? how do you like them apples?

i got what i wanted and there was no parade

ever since the season ended early for clementine's produce and provisions i have had ideas percolating. i wasn't sure where i would end up after everything ended. i bounced around, sat in despair, hibernated, and then all the sudden i got what i wanted all along. my sole job now is being a stay at home mother to hendrix. i haven't had only one job since i was 19. i got what i always wanted and there was no parade. i didn't know how meaningful or funny those words would be when i first uttered them to my therapist and then to my close mom friend. but it's true. i think most women i know spend their twenties having a good time with friends, hoping to fine the ONE. i always wanted children and wanted to stay at home with them even if i didn't always admit it. perhaps that's why i never made serious career moves. see: was a waitress for over 10 years. yikes.
so i started another blog to journal my thoughts...then i never updated it.  i like this blog better, anyway. so now this blog, the one i always loved, will be the journal as i think about what it is i want, what i like, and what i am good at. i have spent since july trying to improve myself ---not overextending myself or my family and being kinder to myself. at this point in the great recovery of 2011, i still believe you should do what you love. so i am going to share with you all what i love and we will see where it takes us. 

thankful + recipe

today is much chiller and much more fall.  it is reminding me that with fall, we have harvest and with harvest we have the feeling of gratitude.  here is what/who i am thankful for today. . .

my lovely hendrix in all of his two year old glory---it is really a glorious age
blocks, tractors, and playdough littering my house---it means there is life and love here
tazo tea with honey and milk
mike---who makes all of my dreams come true
my mom friends, andrea + summer---they keep it real folks
fall clothes
pretty blogs and pinterest
melinda + gma---huge helpers while mike is out of town
constant change---it keeps us on our toes

this chili recipe. . .
anna's chili for mike
1 lb. ground meat, browned
2 cans (28 oz. total) kidney beans, drained and rinsed
1 can tomato soup
1 can diced tomatoes
1/4 c. chili powder
2 T. cumin
1 onion, chopped
mix this all together and add up to one can of water, if need be.  cook on low in crockpot for 6-8 hours.  (i had frozen tomatoes from the garden, frozen homemade tomato soup, and frozen, cooked beans on hand so i used that today - just use what you have and adjust measurements)
serve with cheddar, sour cream, and cornbread.  enjoy!

i hope you are feeling thankful today. xoxo!

fond heart

mike's boss was a traveling salesman for a huge portion of his 30 year career with their company.  the internet has pretty much obliterated the world of traveling salesmen, but shows like the big iron show in fargo allow the old guys to relive the glory days.  mike's boss says his traveling is what made his marriage last.  he is still a workaholic and still married.  i agree that for couples time apart is good medicine. 
a week alone in the country with a sick toddler? not so much.  mike and i  have only spent one week apart in the first couple months of our relationship and one night this past summer during the heat wave. we have been together for 3 1/2 years.  now he is in fargo for the week and souix falls next week for a few days.  i hate it.  sure when he is home he works like a dog and we can be like two ships passing in the night sometimes.  but he is home in our bed.  i cannot imagine having to do this all the time.  i like my fiancee.  when i have spare moments, i want them to be with him. 
the bright side of this time away is that hendrix and i can eat more adventurous dinners.  mike is a meat and potatoes sort of guy.  so vegetarian or poultry or seafood based dishes are only going to drive him to mcdonald's at 9 o' clock at night.  so tonight we get to eat roasted butternut squash with pasta.  maybe time away does make the heart grow fonder.

be kind

as i get farther along in my journey as a mother and a partner i am learning more and more about the smoke and mirrors.  the smoke and mirrors that mothers and couples put up for each other and other people.  i have a really bad habit of comparing myself to other people.  my inner dialogue is not always kind to me. after i really came to terms with how overextended i had made my life. . .i realized that i needed to be kinder to myself.  it is only then that i can be kinder to the most important people in my life.  and when i fumble i need to forgive myself and get over it.  just get over it.  stop playing the same movie about what i could of done differently in my head.  mothers are really tough on themselves.  women by nature are.  we can also be very judgy of one another.  which brings me back to the smoke and mirrors.  that woman that i think has it all. . .the one with the great house that is clean, the smart kids, the nice husband.  you all know the one.  turns out, she has days where she acts like a crazy person when she can't get the smart kids out the door because they are dilly-dallying with the nice husband.  we all have days where we aren't perfect. so be kind to yourself.